Ep. 22 Are you standing in your own way when it comes to your happiness and success ?? [self-awareness]

Are you standing in your own way when it comes to your happiness and success ?

Lets talk about bad habits that you are not aware of and that might keep you in a place of dissatisfaction

What are bad habits ?

How do you identify your bad habits ?

How can you stop engaging in habits that don’t serve you ?

I will address these questions and many more around this super interesting topic

I want to help you reach your goals and dreams

Let me know what you think and share with me how you address habits that feel so good in the moment but make you feel worse on the long run

With love

Books mentioned here

Inspired by Darren Hardy: The Compound Effect

#InsaneProductivity #DarrenDaily #HardyHeroes #TheCompoundEffect

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Transcript
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Hello, and welcome to the Borealis experience. I’m

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your host Aurora. And I’m very happy to be spending some time

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with you today. I hope you’re doing well. Today I want to talk

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about bad habits, and how you can learn step by step to

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replace these bad habits with more beneficial habits. First of

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all, what are bad habits, I believe that bad habits are just

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things that we do, automatically, not consciously

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at all. Things that we do to maybe numb our pain that we

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don’t want to address, things that we do to distract ourselves

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from a boring life with no sense of purpose. Things that we do to

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please others, maybe under peer pressure. It is habits that

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don’t serve us on a higher level. They are instant

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gratification material. So you feel good in the moment, but on

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the long run. If the effects of your bad habits are compounding,

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you end up in a place that feels sad and depressed. Last. So it

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is very good to add times, check in with yourself. And check in

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what you do on a daily basis to help yourself out and to direct

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yourself into the direction you want. Because a lot of times we

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have dreams, we have goals, and we work so hard. But we never

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really seem to be getting closer to those dreams and goals. And

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sometimes it is the little things that you do on a daily

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basis that make you drift away from your goals and dreams

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instead of sliding towards your goals and dreams. I read the

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book the compound effect from Darren Hardy, I highly recommend

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that one because in this book, he describes how the daily

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habits that we engage in steer your steering wheel of life. And

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if you start changing your little habits and replace them

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with more productive, efficient habits, if it’s just one little

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thing that you change at a time, let’s say 1% 2%. Over time, this

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new direction might be so small at the very beginning. Over

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time, you will land directly where you want it to be. Look at

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a plane, a pilot is flying a plane from New York to Los

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Angeles, let’s say. And if he has the steering wheel, just two

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degrees off of the

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usual

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route that he’s flying, he will land in a totally different

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city. Do you know what I’m trying to say? No. So let’s have

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a look at your habits. Is there anything that you do

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unconsciously? And when are you doing these little habits?

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Sometimes we tend to eat a little more when we feel bored

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or sad. Sometimes we drink a little more. If we want to

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forget about a stressful day sometimes, and it’s not for

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everybody but we feel so lonely and disconnected that We think

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porn is going to give us the satisfaction what we need.

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Sometimes we just end up binge watching a series for three

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hours at night, because it’s so engaging and interesting. And we

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feel like we’re connecting with old friends when we watch that

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series. See, and those are the little habits, for instance. Of

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course, there’s many more habits out there that are destructive

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or non productive. But those little habits that I just

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mentioned, make you feel good in the moment. But on the long run,

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they will not get you to wherever you want to be. So how

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do I address the change of those habits, I feel a very important

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thing to note is that we don’t do these habits because we’re

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dumb or such. We do these habits because they give us something

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and we just have to replace them with something better, or even

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add something to our life. So when it comes to food habits,

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when it comes to the bag of chips that you crunch on at

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night, or the ice cream, you have to really think and feel

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into it. What is it that you’re doing right now? Is it the

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loneliness that you want to forget? Is it just simply

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something crunchy, salty or sweet that you’re craving? And

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how can you replace that? Can you replace it with healthier

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choices. And you will see that at the end of the night, you

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will feel less guilty and might even sleep better to start by

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replacing your little snacks by healthier snacks. And we don’t

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have to go into details there. Because most of the time, we

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know what is healthier, we know that chips and ice cream and

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fries are not awesome to eat. But you have to see on the long

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run, you want to have a healthy body, you want to be energetic,

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you want to be fit and fresh the next morning. So see that by

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replacing those fries and chips and ice cream. With healthier

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options, you will feel better, you will not feel like you were

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taken away something but adding value to your life. When it

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comes to binge watching movies or series at night, I would love

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you to track the time. From now on, you track the time, every

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time you sit down in front of your computer or your TV. And at

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the end of the week, or maybe at the end of two weeks or three

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weeks of tracking, like really running around with a little pen

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and paper and writing it down. I want you to add all these

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minutes all these hours together and make you aware of how much

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time you’re spending there. And awareness is usually the biggest

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first step that opens you up to new possibilities and new

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habits. So let’s say you realize you’re spending six hours a week

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in front of your TV, in front of your phone or computer watching

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series and movies. And lately, you felt very disconnected from

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your friends and your family and you feel very lonely. And this

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is why your Netflix in so much. Well. Now we have six hours. And

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now you can decide who you want to connect with over that period

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of time. So again, you see, we are not taking away your Netflix

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and your time in front of the TV. We are replacing it with the

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thing that you’re actually craving. And over time you will

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feel more fulfilled content and happy with yourself. So now you

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take these six hours. And it doesn’t mean that you have to

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spend six hours a week with your friends now, but you can invest

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that time in yourself too. You can go for a nice walk, you can

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go for a swim, you can go for a hike, you can go to an art

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gallery, but being aware that it was six hours of your precious

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lifetime that you spent in front of a TV which didn’t bring you

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anything but instant gratification and as sense of

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relaxation that is also not really

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to, you will feel much better over time, if you start doing

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that little new habit that replaces the TV watching on a

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daily basis, or let’s say, weekly basis. So we addressed

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food habits. And with food habits, another thing I want to

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add here is that you just get rid of all the junk food that

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you have at home, and you replace it with yummy good

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things. And at the same time, know that you are going to see

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such crazy good effects when it comes to your physical health.

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And that, in turn, will also affect your mental health. Then

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we addressed unconsciously spending time online or in front

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of the TV. And this is very precious time that you can spend

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with yourself. For instance, reading, going for a walk, going

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for a swim, or meeting up with friends or meeting up with new

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people. Another habit, bad habit that I want to address here is

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when it comes to not being honest with yourself and not

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being honest with your surroundings. A lot of times we

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feel shame, maybe because we are unemployed at the moment, or we

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are single, and we don’t really want to be single. And it is

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those conclusions, let’s say that we make about that

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situation, that make it even worse. Because we feel we are

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not good enough. We feel we’re not living a life that is worth

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enjoying and living to the fullest. And in not being honest

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with ourselves and okay with ourselves, we tend to avoid

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people, we tend to blame people and be resentful towards people,

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especially towards the people that seem to have it all. And it

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is that judgmental mindset that I want to address here with you.

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Which is also a very bad habit. Because the judgments that you

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have about yourself, will deeply affect how you feel about

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yourself. And the decisions you make for yourself. And the way

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you relate to other people will also be deeply affected if you

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don’t feel enough, if you don’t feel like you have anything to

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contribute to society. So the third little habit that I want

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to address here is the thoughts that you have towards yourself,

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the judgment you have towards yourself. Maybe you’re not where

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you want it to be at in your life. If you think back like

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five or 10 years ago, you were dreaming or where am I going? Am

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I going to be I want to have a family, I want to have a house I

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wanted to travel and you haven’t accomplished these goals. And

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now you feel like a failure. Now you feel like you have to hide

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and you cannot. Yeah, be yourself because you’re going to

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be judged by others. And this is complete Bs, the more you accept

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yourself and the more you are okay with where you’re at, and

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you trust that you are on the right path and you are doing

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everything possible to be on a good path. You don’t need to

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hide you don’t need to be ashamed. And you will see that

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people will accept you more, the more you accept yourself. You

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see, the judgment of another person can only touch you if you

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believe what they are saying. Let’s say you’re insecure with

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your physical appearance you do you don’t feel beautiful, you

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don’t feel okay wearing certain things. Now if a person comes

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along and says while those leggings are kinda tight right?

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In this into in this moment sorry, they will trigger your

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discomfort they would trigger your thoughts of in adequacy.

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And you will give them the power to be right and give them the

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power to make you feel that way. But let’s imagine if you fully

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accepted your body if you fully enjoyed your body and

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appreciated and appreciated your body. If a person would come

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along and say, Wow, no slogans are tight, you would not even

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think about taking on that comment, or believing their

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comment, you would know that this comment is all about them,

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and not about you, they might have a bad day, they might feel

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they have to make another person feel shitty because they feel

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shitty about themselves. And you would leave that shitty comment

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with them. So when it comes to your thoughts, when it comes to

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your beliefs about yourself that might be still holding you back

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from living a fulfilled life. I want you to start notice your

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thoughts, and maybe even write down your thoughts. When you

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have the time when you make the time to track and to see how

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destructive our thoughts can be. When I started doing that, I

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realized wow, like the thoughts. The judgment that I have towards

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myself is so nasty is so self destructive. And I wouldn’t even

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talk to a person that I don’t like this way, you know, you

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would never talk even to a friend, the way you think about

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yourself at times, and this is something we need to address.

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This is something that you can gently over time, change and

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replace with positive affirmations and with positive.

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Like journaling, gratitude journaling, when you write

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everything down, that you like about yourself, you will start

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appreciating yourself accepting yourself. And people will sense

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that shift in energy and things will start flowing towards you,

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instead of away from you. So make the time over the next

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couple of weeks and have a look at your habits. Have a look at

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what might still holding you back from getting this fulfilled

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relationship from getting this dream job or from starting a

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project that you wanted to start a long time ago already. And

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always know that I’m super curious to know what you’re

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thinking about this was providing you with tools that

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serve you and what are your experiences with noticing your

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bad habits now? And do you feel like you need maybe a little bit

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of support to help you out finding new beneficial habits?

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shoot me a message on Facebook or add me on Instagram and

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message me there. Make sure to subscribe to this little podcast

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here that serves you so well and brings you joy and hope and self

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reflect flection and leave me a review on Apple podcast. Thank

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you so much. I will be out there very soon again for you. Bye

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bye,

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